Hurra!
Once again, the upside of exhaustion: feelings are dulled, also the negative ones.
I keep coming back to this, though: Where's the longing? Isn't there supposed to be some?
And: I keep thinking, I've lost. There never was a race or a competition. Still. And still yet, I refuse. Blind imbecility? Foolish denial of reality? Hmm. Maybe just incapability. Or comfortable fall into warm, stale patterns. Nothing as comforting as same old, same old. Bah!
What if you feel: actually I don't want the person supposed to mean most to me in life to be at that event? I haven't got that hang of this thing called life. Ha - ha - ha - ha - ha!
I keep coming back to this, though: Where's the longing? Isn't there supposed to be some?
And: I keep thinking, I've lost. There never was a race or a competition. Still. And still yet, I refuse. Blind imbecility? Foolish denial of reality? Hmm. Maybe just incapability. Or comfortable fall into warm, stale patterns. Nothing as comforting as same old, same old. Bah!
What if you feel: actually I don't want the person supposed to mean most to me in life to be at that event? I haven't got that hang of this thing called life. Ha - ha - ha - ha - ha!
ronjavondermattisburg - 18. Jan, 00:42
